LGBTQ+ students navigate a complicated system for bullying in Delaware
LGBTQ+ students in Delaware face higher risks of bullying than their peers, but the system set up to protect them is complicated by local rule. | SPOTLIGHT DELAWARE PHOTO BY JULIA MEROLA
Delaware’s LGBTQ+ youth have faced multiple decisions being made by the state and federal governments regarding their existence in recent years.
This past legislative session, a bill that would prohibit transgender high school athletes from competing in sports that match their gender identity was stalled. While the majority of schools follow President Biden’s Title IX regulations that went into effect on Aug. 1, five schools in the state remain under former President Donald Trump’s 2020 regulations that raised the criteria for victims to prove discrimination and sexual misconduct.
Families have witnessed harmful rhetoric toward the community on political stages and in the media, and those online interactions have translated to more than 700 national incidents of violence and threats targeting LGBTQ+ individuals.
“Between the pandemic and some of the political rhetoric and the bullying that we’ve seen among adults, openly and on television, it’s been a really difficult time for us to model for kids what’s effective relationship building and what good, healthy relationships look like,” said Kim Leisey, the executive director of CAMP Rehoboth, a longtime LGBTQ+ community center.
LGBTQ+ youth are nearly twice as likely to be called names, verbally harassed or physically assaulted at school compared to their non-LGBTQ+ classmates, according to a survey by the Human Rights Campaign. The risk of self-harm with LGBTQ+ students is also two times more likely with every instance of verbal or physical harassment.
Delaware’s students noticed that shift in attitudes toward the LGBTQ+ population during the 2016 presidential election, and believe those attitudes changed again ahead of the 2024 presidential election.
In 2016, “it became very common online and in real life to be more homophobic, all these sorts of things, transphobic, misogynistic under the Trump presidency,” said Kendall, a senior at Smyrna High School. “[After President Biden was elected] it became a lot more open-minded in my opinion, especially on online spaces and in real life.”
Spotlight Delaware chose to only use students’ first names due to the sensitivity of the issue and because all are still minors.
Kendall said that as Election Day grew closer, the rhetoric reverted to how it was during Trump’s presidency.
Although these laws are targeted toward students, parents have also expressed concerns for their children who may be the target of LGBQT+ discrimination and bullying, and many haven’t found the help they need in their districts through support for students or the reporting process.
Underreporting bullying incidents
Local education entities reported more than 1,300 alleged bullying and cyberbullying incidents during the 2022-23 school year, with 29% of incidents substantiated. That same year, Delaware had more than 123,500 students enrolled in its 202 schools in 19 school districts.
Bullying is extremely underreported in the state and many schools have just one incident of bullying that is recorded, which is statistically impossible, said Andrea Rashbaum, an advocate who is a co-founder of Parents of Trans and Gender Expansive Kids (PTK) Delaware.
Rashbaum is one of PTK Delaware’s facilitators and uses her teaching background to help parents address bullying cases. That work has shown her how bullying is often addressed or reported throughout the state.
Teachers and administration are supposed to report allegations of bullying through systems like the Data Service Center, but Rashbaum believes that many educators don’t know about the reporting system, or that they don’t feel supported by their administrators when going through the reporting process.
“The teachers don’t want to document it because they don’t feel administration will support them, which is a huge piece of this. They don’t feel supported by their administration,” Rashbaum said. “I know I’ve worked with Sussex [County] schools where that is the case, where I’ve gone all the way to administration and they’re like, ‘Well, is this really bullying?’”
Rashbaum often recommends parents document their conversations with administrators, guidance counselors and teachers and, if needed, go to the superintendent with their concerns. She also recommends that parents contact the U.S. Department of Education’s Office of Civil Rights because districts will immediately work toward getting results when a state or federal organization is involved.
Students outed, called slurs by classmates
Students in Delaware have expressed a mixed experience between feeling supported by some teachers and administrators or ignored by both. Spotlight Delaware met with seven students to learn more about their experiences.
Some students like Morgan, a junior attending school in the Wilmington area, feel that teachers are more supportive than the administration.
Morgan acknowledged that his school is very supportive of different identities, but noted that there were times when his peers seemingly didn’t receive support from the administration when dealing with bullying.
While in middle school, one of Morgan’s peers was “outed” to the rest of their grade. When the student spoke with a guidance counselor, “the response that was given was, ‘Oh, I thought it was obvious. I thought you were already out,’” Morgan said.
In other districts, students feel like their environment directly impacts how they’re treated in school. Students in Smyrna High School’s Open Minds organization explained that attitudes toward LGBTQ+ students depend on which school they attend.
Some Smyrna students believe that because their district is located in a rural area, some of their classmates are raised with inaccurate and harmful beliefs about the LGBTQ+ community. Studies have also shown that LGBTQ+ youth from small towns or rural areas are more likely to hear anti-LGBTQ remarks and experience discrimination than those from urban or suburban schools.
Students in Open Minds expressed that some teachers and students are welcoming and supportive of their identities, but they’ve also experienced anti-LGBTQ bullying. Some students have been called homophobic slurs and been labeled as “it” instead of their preferred gender by their classmates, and have had teachers question their preferred names.
“We get called different names across the hallway, yelled at for stuff [like dressing alternatively],” said DJ, 17, one of the members of Open Minds at Smyrna High School. “One of [the incidents] was actually related to my gender because they’re like ‘Oh, look at what he’s wearing. Oh no, that’s a girl, whatever it is.”
Bullying prevention left to the districts
The Delaware education system operates under local control, meaning operational decisions relating to student conduct and discipline are made at the school district and charter levels.
The state’s school bullying prevention law requires district and charter schools to have their own procedures in place to report bullying to officials along with their own cyberbullying regulations. The Delaware Department of Education can’t override individual student conduct and discipline decisions though.
Advocates in the state have previously sought to have protections for LGBTQ+ students in Delaware through Regulation 225, which would have protected transgender students facing discrimination at school, but was shelved in 2018.
“In updating this document we wanted to add gender identity as a marginalized community. And in that document we wanted to add ways to support and affirm students who are transgender or gender expansive,” Rashbaum said. “It would have become a state policy, and then we wouldn’t have had to worry about each individual school district having a policy.”
Along with procedures for addressing bullying, school districts like Smyrna provide definitions of bullying and explain their reporting process.
State lawmakers, which include openly gay, transgender and non-binary members today, have also sought to help educate. A resolution passed last session directed the state department of education to develop culturally responsive education related to LGBTQ+ history by encouraging the department to work with key stakeholders to identify age-appropriate lessons for students in grades 7-12.
Many schools throughout the state also have their own Gender and Sexuality Alliance (GSA) organizations that provide a safe space for their students.
Organizations like United Way of Delaware also work with GSA advisors in schools and offer support to them and their students, and also hold site support to help make the environment better for young people, said John Fisher-Klein, the director of public policy and engagement at United Way of Delaware.
‘That’s where you need GSAs’
Advocates for LGBTQ+ youth agree that the current reporting systems in the state aren’t perfect.
Fisher-Klein believes the state needs “good data” on what’s currently happening in Delaware’s schools along with documentation of policies from all districts and charter schools in one report, but acknowledges the state is based on local control.
“I do understand the opposition to a statewide regulation. But there are best practices, and there’s plenty of evidence that ensuring that LGBTQ+ youth are not bullied is a life-saving measure. And I think we can all agree that that’s what we want,” Fisher-Klein said.
While advocates work to promote security, LGBTQ+ students in Delaware find support in their school’s Open Minds or GSA organizations.
Morgan, who has previously held a leadership position at his school’s Gender, Sexuality and Diversity organization, understands how important these spaces are for his friends who might not be in schools that are as supportive. He believes that GSAs are needed when there is active hate toward LGBTQ+ people.
“That’s where you need GSAs… like, ‘Okay, our students need that safe space because they’re constantly surrounded by, whether it’s verbal or not, almost like this violence.’ So they need a sort of safe space,” Morgan said. “They need a room where they can go and rest. Once you have that, then it’s ‘OK, how are we addressing just negative environments created by just constant comments?’”